Victimised by your self?

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Author: Anders Christian Hjort

I just saw this quote and update on Facebook this morning.

At Huthwaite we say “Power is in the head” when negotiating and handling customer complaint where feelings are involved.

All have a choice
In customer complaints the customer can choose to play the Villain and/or the Victim. And you can choose also to handle the customer abusing your power playing the Hero – “I have the power to save you, but if you don’t behave, I also have the power to say no”, or the Victim “you are not fair to me now, I have to follow the rules here, so I’m not able to help you”. Feelings escalate in defend/attack spirals and one party ends up being the looser, and the other party wins.

But you have a choice to get the power balance right, so both parties can have a normal conversation and both win – having a win/win mindset and understanding that you have a choice in the way you dose your power will enable you to embrace the situation and be less emotional. You have the choice using your intelligence, passion and imagination to engage in conversations that lead to alternative solutions were two parties win together.

Think of this – It’s either a win/loose game, or a win/win long term – which would you prefer?


It’s your choice to take the lead and set the scene getting the power balance right.

Use your power gently, and with a warm heart.

Enjoy 🙂

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